Writer Garage

The actual, real Batmobile and Batpod used in filming The Dark Knight made visits to 14 cities around the United States, and a St Louis Wehrenberg Theater was one of them!

Alright, I’m about to geek-out. Prepare yourself.

OMG THE BATMOBILE.

Smaller than I thought it was going to be.

Even the trailer was cool.

I’m really excited about The Dark Knight, midnight shows will be on 7/17.

Take a few minutes today and learn a very complicated looking Contact Juggling move, the Two Handed Crossed Up Isolation. It’s a great first step into the world of contact juggling, and since the cross-up iso is easy to pick up, it’s a quick carrot to grab.

As far as updates go, well, I know they have been kind of slack, but I should be able to retain my schedule for the foreseeable future.

The 1morechapter blog has posted the titles from 1001 Books to Read before You Die, an intimidating list of material for any literature fan. I’d like to consider myself well read, but if I’ve only read 40 books from the 1001, a mere 3.996%, do I really have an opinion that could be considered valuable?

To be honest, I haven’t even finished all of the 40 books on that list. Anne Proulx The Shipping News? Any brave soul that ventures to the end of that novel deserves a Congressional Medal of Honor, or in the very least a peaceful escape into the afterlife. The book was terrible, but it made the list.

I believe John August  agrees with me on this point, arbitrary lists spanning hundreds of years of literature may not be everybody’s cup of tea. I was worried I wouldn’t break 10 until I hit books from the 1900s and onward. My saving grace, as far as the list goes, were William Faulkner and Hemingway.

On top of all fo this, a good amount of the list reaks of elitist lit-critic trash. Anne Proulx’s stinker was mentioned prior, but look who else makes the list, Jane Austen, Louisa May Alcott and everything written by Charles Dickens! Surely, they are all great writers, but do they really warrant required reading before you die? I mean, I’m in absolute love with Italo Calvino, but I really wouldn’t push If on a winter’s night a traveler… to every reader.

Read for the sake of reading, and read what you enjoy. Don’t bother with lists that claim you’ve missed all the important facets.

Writing flash fiction, nano fiction, short shorts, et cetera can not only be a lot of fun, but also a great way to warm up to a new story. After reading a few of Ruzkin’s 50-word Fiction pieces, I had to give it a shot. Although I wasn’t too sure how strict a person had to be on the 50 word target, I kept myself to using exactly 50 words to keep it interesting for myself, but that is not a rule that you, as a writer, have to follow.

Survival
Thomas opened his copy of the Post to the classifieds. Drivers, housekeepers, fry cooks and nurses were all wanted, but not network technicians. He pulled the newsprint over his body and managed to fall asleep on a bench. Thomas needed to stay dry if he wanted to survive the night.

Hot Coffee
Every night, except for tonight, Leonard Pilot goes to the Boston Bread Company for a whole wheat bagel and iced black coffee. Every night, they give him a hot cup of coffee. Tonight, Leonard reminds himself, he’ll give them a hot coffee.

Leonard doesn’t even know what that means. Yet.

Communication Breakdown
Samantha was nervous about taking her Chicago friends out to dinner with Robbie. Since he had got back from culinary school daily eating had become complicated ordeals.

“But Robbie, nobody cares whether the Cashew Chicken is Springfield style,” she said.

“Ignorance is no reason to ignore the oyster sauce, Sam.”

Fairy Tale
In the kingdom of Burr lived a menacing ghost. Chuck, as his friends called him, began to worry about the recent Burrian economic downturn. With ghost scoiety dependent upon happy, living humans, Chuck felt it was his duty to help.

Soon, Chuck realized the complexity of being a Monarchy’s accountant.

Closing Thoughts
I found this exercise to be more difficult than I planned. Compressing an entire narrative into such a few words seemed impossible, and only after thinking through my characters and the importance of each word was I able to complete each short.

What I’ve learned, is that there is no reason that this importance and focus shouldn’t be carried into a longer narrative. In fact, one of the 50 word shorts I was writing continued itself well past its 50 word limit. I hope to see it as a fully fleshed out story soon, but it may serve well enough as a lesson in being concise and well paced. It really makes me want to pick up Italo Calvino’s Six Memos for the New Millennium.

By the way
As an astronomy buff, I would feel amiss not to mention the Total Lunar Eclipse tonight, be sure to check it out.

Edit: It’s more official-er, Toshiba has issued a press release.

It’s finally official, Toshiba has dropped HD-DVD, so what happens next? Well, that’s a question many are asking. We’ll take a quick look at each aspect of the Toshiba HD-DVD industry to get a better idea of what’s to come.

Movies
If you own an HD-DVD player, then this is probably a pretty good scenario for you, despite how it sounds at first. There are hundreds of HD titles available, and within the coming months, they will hit rock bottom prices. In theory, you’ll be able to fill an entire movie library for $100.

PC
The internal PC high definition drive market really hasn’t been much of a format war. This is widely due to home theater enthusiasts not only requiring the expensive drive, but also an expensive video card capable of displaying high definition content. At which point, it makes far more sense to purchase a stand alone device.

The final nail in the PC coffin was the lack of any PC software requiring users to purchase the drives. Remember, CDROM drives weren’t sold based off the assumption that the emerging technology was “better” than floppy diskettes, they were sold because of Myst.

Don’t believe such software could push a product today? Microsoft Windows Vista’s sales increased after the release of Halo 2 for the PC. A game that required DirectX 10, which is only available under Vista. Funny, considering Halo 2 was an Xbox game, a DirectX 7 device.

Xbox 360
Microsoft has long been a strong supporter of the HD-DVD standard, arguably due to a nameless competitor using the rival format, Bluray. However, they never went so far as to embed the HD-DVD drive into their own system, only selling it as an accessory to home theater enthusiasts. This was a risky move by Microsoft that has definitely paid off.

Toshiba
The bottom line for Toshiba is a loss of hundreds of millions of dollars. However, for a company with 200,000 employees this isn’t going to be a death rattle by any stretch. Toshiba’s sales are incredibly diversified, and the company is sure to bounce back strong. They have always been a consumer product and PC manufacturer, and will continue to do so well into the future.

The importance of the first sentence in a body of work, whether a political blog or a novel, can not be overstated. However important, it is very easy to misunderstand the goal of the first sentence. Instead of going on and on about what you should and shouldn’t do, we will learn together by picking apart some of the first sentences of the world’s best storytellers.

Neil Gaiman, Neverwhere
“The night before he went to London, Richard Mayhew was not enjoying himself.”

This sentence tells us about the setting, the main character and what to expect of the narrative. We know the story begins at night, within a half-days travel of London, the outlook of the main character, and that the narrative is in third person and past tense. This is a generic example, but it’s also a fine example of a developed world. Richard Mayhew and the world around him are alive.

Kurt Vonnegut, Harrison Bergeron
“The year was 2081, and everybody was finally equal.”

There are many things we don’t know about the story from this first sentence, and yet it tells us more than the previous example. We know it’s set in the future and in past tense, we don’t know who the main character is or what perspective the story is in. But the emphasis on how the world is equal “finally” gives us an idea of the story’s tone, narrative, plot and scope. All in one word.

Italo Calvino, If on a winter’s night a traveler
“You are about to begin reading Italo Calvino’s new novel, If on a winter’s night a traveler.”

Arguably, the most important goal of a first sentence is to hook the reader, which Italo Calvino does flawlessly. This story, at least in its first chapter, is in second person, and it is about you, the reader, attempting to finish the book. The book itself is infinitely complicated, but the first sentence contains enough information to tell the reader where the work is heading.

Give it a Shot
As a mental excercise, go grab a couple books. One that you have read and one that you don’t know much about. Write down the first sentence from each and see how much information you can glean from the narrative. Hopefully, you’ll have as much fun as I do when I pick up a book.

Today’s youth are being bombarded with same-sex couples and erotica laced advertisements, but BOOKS are a culprit that have been dodging regulation for decades. If your priorities are arranged anything like mine, then you understand the importance of protecting the world’s children from the filth, obscenities and violence depicted throughout the modern media.

Warning: Explicit Content
Although many will complain that video game, music and movie rating systems aren’t doing enough, they will be hard pressed to find any system at all to prevent obscene books from reaching a child’s hands. Thanks to the unregulated nature of the First Amendment, any child has access to information that allows them to sell drugs, or themselves, on the street.

With this money in hand, they can walk into any bookstore and purchase even more mind-filth. As little Bobby or Suzie drops James Joyce or William Faulkner on the counter, the devil behind the counter won’t even go so far as to ask for ID before offering the defenseless child bargains on future pornography.

Public Pornographers
But it gets worse, not only are there no systems in place to prevent a child from purchasing this garbage, there are people who hand out this smut for free. These trash pushers, or libraries, only ask that the child give up their home address. We can only speculate for what reason, but it’s assumed to be for homosexual orgies/communist rallies/Ayn Rand.

While all of this is happening, our government is turning their back on us, with many public schools banning the most important book a child could ever read, the Bible. With the true word of God, as handed down to us by old men over the course of several editions, translations and hundreds of years, being kept away from these kids, how are they ever expected to turn into responsible adults?

Studies Prove It
The truth is they aren’t expected, with more and more research proving beyond the shadow of a doubt that exposure to violent, pornographic material as a youth leads to violent sex offenders. A University of Michigan study proved it. They have professors there, with degrees. In science. Probably.

More studies have shown that books may even be worse than The Internet. With 4.2 million pornographic sites online in the Internet’s 20 year history, we can assume that children have amassed over 273 million pornographic books since the beginning of early literature.

Fight For Your Right to Censor!
Don’t allow these pornographers like Mark Twain and Neil Gaiman to hide behind the constitution any longer, contact your legislators today about warning labels and a tiered rating system to prevent today’s youth from becoming tomorrow’s violent sex offenders!

A routine is one of, if not the most, essential aspect of a live, juggling performance. Although knowing hundreds of technically difficult tricks will be of some assistance, flair is far from required. Although the task of building a routine from scratch may seem like pushing a boulder up a mountain, it can be broken down and completed before you know it.

Instead of looking at the blank slate, it is better to take a look at what you know. Take a few minutes now to write down the moves you can perform with confidence. This will give you a clear reference, so you won’t second guess if you’ve forgotten that really cool palmspin isolation you’ve practiced for months. After writing the list, write a letter next to each move.

Moves that I, Floyd, can confidently perform:

A: Butterfly
B: Squeeze Ups
C: Inner elbow stall
D: Halfpipe
E: Circles
F: Circle Toss Thingie
G: Back to Palm
H: Palm to Back
I: Edson’s Enigma
J: Floating Enigma
K: Three Finger Hold

The importance of assigning a letter is so that you can write your own routine string, which is a great way to write your routine down on paper for future reference. It’s also because I’m a geek and I like long running lists of characters. Sue me.

What you want to do now is to find two-letter combinations that flow well. You want to look closely, and examine how smooth the transition is from one move to the other.

An example of good flow would be HA, since the Palm-to-back ends with the ball at the back of the hand in the cradle, which is the beginning of the butterfly. It’s also important to understand that flow is fairly personal. I can’t gracefully flow through AB or KI, so I probably wouldn’t use that combination in a routine.

Now, after you find several two-letter combinations that flow well, it’s time to piece them together. Here are a few combinations that worked well for me.

CA BJ KE JI IK AK GC EH AG HA

If I were to begin with a routine with Squeeze Ups (B), then I could start with BJ. I only have one other combination that starts with J, so I would follow with JI, giving me BJI. I continue this process until I have BJIKEHAGCAK.

This is, essentially, the routine itself. I never have done all of those moves in order, but I know they flow well since I tested each transition individually. Sure, there are a few things left, such as practicing the routine and deciding on which creative commons music to use on your YouTube video, but you’ve pushed that boulder over the mountain. It’s all downhill from here.

Note: I’ll have a YouTube video of this routine up soon. Apparently, they have this “SuperBowl” thing that distracts males like myself around this time each year.

If you have been keeping track of this site the past week, you may have noticed there weren’t any updates. Well, there is good news. I started a new job last Monday, and I wanted to focus all of my attention into it for the week.

A new article will be up for Monday, but I may post it Sunday (tomorrow) if things go well enough, fast enough. It’s going to be about forming your own juggling routine, but it can easily be about doing anything in your life. Treat juggling as a metaphor for any complicated task, if you want.

After that, things will return the normally scheduled programming, with updates on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

I swear FOXNews isn’t even trying to be legitimate news source.

UFO Story from the AP? Throw it up on the main page.

Asteroid nearly hitting the earth? Better alert the masses.

Strange Lights
First up is the widely reported UFO Sighting over Stephenville, Texas. The information in the article is fairly straightforward.

The Air Force admits to doing test flights of up to 10 F-16s in the area. Even the title of the article claims the mystery to be solved. Why then, FOXNews, are you allowing an article to run where only 9% of the content relates to it being F-16 flight training, and the other 91% pertains to “UFOs sighted over Texas, Government Denies it?”

They even have a cute artist’s conception of a UFO printed with the article. Here’s a little concept drawing I did to show what they really saw.

Apocalypse, now!
Second, we have the Asteroid 2007 TU24 that is being so widely misreported that Phil Plait had to make a video so he could stop writing about it! FOXNews still seems to believe it’s a threat, however.

Now, not only does FOXNews fall for all of this craziness, they even have an artist’s concept up of an asteroid grazing the earth. Even better, 33% of the article doesn’t even inform the masses about what an extraordinary astronomical event this is. Rather, they discuss a What-if scenario of Armageddon.

These are NOT freak occurrences among their articles. On the contrary, it’s a perfect example of standard flair over at FOXNews. If they were to really live up to their slogan they wouldn’t have made exaggerated claims and hyped up events so mundane as a rock floating through space, they would just report the facts and not decide to sensationalize everything.